Is jazz a blatant rip off of Sonic? Yes. But the key difference between these games is that jazz jackrabbit quit after making only ONE bad game. Sonic has been making those for like two decades now.

Sonic Gameplay Capture:    • Sonic the Hedgehog (Mega Drive/Genesi...  

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This is it, the royal rumble nobody has been waiting for. Rabbit versus Hedgehog. Who will win. As a rat myself I am an impartial judge. Although I will admit that I was too poor to own anything as cool as a Sega as a kid so my nostalgia is all wrapped in Jazz Jackrabbit on MS Dos.
But as YouTube 80s synthwave playlists with music that doesn't predate 2010, you don't need to have had any experience with ANYTHING related to a thing to be nostalgic for it.

I did have a couple Sonic comics and I have primal memories of the one and only time I ever saw or played a Game Gear. This was enough to indoctrinated me into a lifetime of being a Crime against god,

a furry.

I’m going to do a shopping list of important gameplay elements and give a point to one game or the other. I’m going to let the chips fall where they may, and then crunch them into the carpet. I presume that phrase has always been talking about corn chips.

Now let's start this list with what really matters. HOW THEY LOOK.

Remember, beauty is only skin deep so don't get flayed because underneath your just ugly all the way to the bones.

It’s hard to beat Sonic and his mono eye. But Jazz Jackrabbit has a doorag on. This is a character who saw Rambo back in the day and was like, yes. This is the guy I’m getting all my fashion sense from.

With that said I'm giving this to Sonic. just cause a lot of the official art for Jazz Jackrabbit looks like it's been drawn in MS Paint.

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Boss Fights

Sonic bosses are legitimately interesting set pieces. For the first boss in jazz jackrabbit you can mostly opt out. You can be like an american cop just blindly blasting away into that turtles property. Justice will be served to someone, somewhere.

Points to sonic.

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Gameplay

Well Sonic is anything but Sonic most of the time. Have you seen that little bitch deal with the slightest upward slope. Playing a sonic level for the first time is so sluggish it makes me feel like pulling my teeth out. The design philosophy of Sonic is to teach newbies that they suck dick and that speed is only for the worthy. only after a pre-requisit number of dick sucks will they get to a point where they actually enjoy the experience.

In other words Sonic is a game that is better the second time you play it. There are plenty of people that have bounced off this series purely because enjoyment for it starts at a big zero, before increasing exponentially for anyone who gives the barest amount of fucks and puts in the effort.

Jazz Jackrabbit is blazing fast from the start, and it doesn't care what sort of slope you're on. It doesn't even care that it only lets you see about two feet in front of you so literally every enemy is a surprise when you slam into them at a thousand miles an hour. Survival is predicated on having a bullet shield in front of you at all times and knowing when to go fast and when to be cautious. Which is never.

I'm going to give this one to sonic. It's done it's own thing with platformers and completely reconsidered how you move and how you play.

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Water Levels:

Jazz Jackrabbit has never had to drown like a bitch. I rest my case.

Points to Jazz.

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Music: Sonic continues to inspire catchy tunes to this day, but what Jazz Jackrabbit did in the sound blaster era was downright revolutionary. It was dynamic, groovy and inspiring. There's an entire video I could do on jazz's music and I'm not wasting it on this shitpost.

I'm giving this one to jazz

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The creators: jazz was co-developed by Cliffy B as his first gig at Epic. He went on to shake the industry up with gears of war.

Sonic co creator yuji Naka went on to make Balan Wonderworld. And then he went to prison. I'm not even joking. He's serving two and half years.

While god may punish the children for their fathers sins, I’m better than God, so I won’t. This point isn’t going to affect the scores I just wanted to laugh about a guy going to prison


Who has the cooler girlfriend.

Another lesson YouTube taught me is that I should hate women while simultaneously hinging my entire existence on them.
Well Jazz Jackrabbit has a big titty green girl rabbit Princess and Sonic is getting tail, if you know what I mean... Hey Siri, is Tails a girl-.

Since Jazz Jackrabbit is the only one to cannonically get layed I'm gonna give this to him purely on a "god job champ" basis.

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