How do parents balance their wish to know about their kids’ lives with their teens’ right to privacy? In episode 171 Dr. Lisa and Reena talk through the tension of respecting teens’ autonomy while staying informed as parents, particularly in the context of teenagers keeping personal journals. A letter from a thoughtful mother of four teenagers raises important questions about navigating boundaries and fostering open communication. Dr. Lisa explores the ethical implications of secretly reading a teen’s journal and highlights the importance of also preserving trust.. She provides insights into why teenagers may close themselves off from their parents and offers alternative strategies for maintaining connection and support. Reena asks what the research says about the costs and benefits of snooping in order to learn more about our kids.

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A word from our lawyers:
The advice provided on this podcast does not constitute or serve as a substitute for professional psychological treatment, therapy, or other types of professional advice or intervention.
If you have concerns about your child’s well being, consult a physician or mental health professional.
If you’re looking for additional resources, check out Lisa’s website: https://drlisadamour.com/

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Episode Timestamps:

00:00 - Introduction
01:25 - Letter
04:31 - Is a kid shutting you out a good reason to snoop?
10:48 - Having an open conversation with your teen
16:27 - Kids get private
18:36 - How snooping affects parent-child relationships
20:51 - How to repair a breach of trust after snooping
24:33 - Parenting to Go