ive been making up for not sleeping the last few night because ferdi had bad nights. yesterday when he went to the day centre i took me time. no training as my battery was a little low. i finished sewing a t-shirt and posted it on facebook.i couldnt think of the words for what i wanted to finish it. it just wasnt there anymore. i would have panicked before for losing words but now i can just let it go. its not worth the trouble.
i did a little gardening, went shopping and as it was a nice day put the roof down on my car. the simple thing of it was like "zen candy"
im not religious but am spiritual. started listening to a podcast on spotify called buddist bootcamp which is small epidsodes that are easy for me to digest. when im able to read a book properly again i look forward to going back in to more mindfulness reading. its because of these practices ive learned to let go of what i cant control and to let go of frustration. it means i have more strength and energy for whats important. holding on to negative emotions takes too much energy and isnt worth it. they take maximum energy for no reward.